PoliticsWhen the Colonist Sneezes: Macron's Migraine and Africa's Awakening

When the Colonist Sneezes: Macron’s Migraine and Africa’s Awakening

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Somewhere in Europe, a man in a tailored suit clutched a wine glass and muttered the most revealing insult of the decade. Not in a bar, not on a private yacht on the Riviera, but in the polished corridors of power. Thierry Breton, former French Economy Minister, slipped—no, swaggered—into what some call brutal honesty. Or was it a colonial hangover talking?

Breton’s words rang like the stubborn echo of a dying empire. He accused Emmanuel Macron, France’s young and restless President, of a cardinal sin: stupidity. Not your average kind—the type that, according to Breton, accidentally handed Africa a mirror to see its own face. A terrifying thing, apparently. Breton fears that this reflection will lead to revolution.

“If France loses its colonies, our children and grandchildren will go to Africa in search of their livelihoods,” he moaned, almost tearfully. “Immigration will change direction.”

Dear reader, let’s pause. Breathe. Sip some sobolo. Then read that again.

So, the secret is out. Africa is not a basket case; it’s the breadbasket-in-waiting. What they fear is not our poverty—it’s our potential. If we dare to wake up, stand up, and show up, the colonists will line up at our embassies, visa in hand, CV in folder, asking for opportunities.

And just when you thought he’d stop digging his own neocolonial grave, Monsieur Breton went for the jugular:

“Africa has no history, therefore cannot run the world.”

Ahem.

Where do we begin, monsieur? With the ancient empires of Mali and Ghana, when Paris was still a muddy village? Or with Imhotep, the African architect who built the world’s first stone structures while Europe was still grappling with tribal face paint?

Kwame Nkrumah must be turning in his grave—but probably not with sorrow. Perhaps with a revolutionary chuckle. For it was Nkrumah who warned us:

“Neocolonialism is the last stage of imperialism.”

Now, the neocolonialists aren’t even subtle. They say the quiet part loud—and in full HD.

But Africans, too, have evolved. Gone are the days when we’d say “yes, massa” with a smile and carry bales of cotton for compliments. The winds from Bamako to Ouagadougou now blow with grit. Soldiers in fatigues and civilians in frustration are writing a new history—one of reclamation, self-determination, and, dare I say, swagger.

Breton’s strange confidence that “if one of the putschists’ heads falls, the rest will abandon the vision” is telling. These guys still think Africa is a game of dominoes—knock one, and the rest will follow. But Africa is no longer a game board; it is the player. The pawns have read the playbook.

This is not an article to glorify coups. No. But when desperation becomes a language, people listen to whoever speaks it—whether in suits or uniforms.

The underlying message is simple: Africa is not a problem to be solved but a people to be respected.

So, what’s the takeaway?

Our leaders must wake up. And not the kind of political yawning we see after donor breakfasts. Real awakening. The type that reads our own history, guards our sovereignty, educates our youth, feeds our people, and stops begging for what we already have.

To African leaders:
You were not elected to be caretakers of colonial leftovers. You were chosen to be architects of a future worthy of our past.

Beware the flattery of global summits and the sweet poison of aid with a flag on it. The words of our enemies are revealing, but the silence of our leaders is deafening.

And if you ever forget your place in history, just remember: those who think Africa has no history are usually those who fear it the most.

Did this post make you laugh, think—or both? Share it with a friend, or better yet, a politician. Leave your thoughts in the comments… preferably without blocking anyone’s sunlight.


The writer is a media executive, author, and sharp-eyed social commentator. His debut novel, Blood and Gold: The Rebellion of Sikakrom, now available on Amazon Kindle, explores power, rebellion, and the soul of a nation. When he’s not steering broadcast operations, he’s busy challenging conventions—often with satire, always with purpose.

DISCLAIMER: The Views, Comments, Opinions, Contributions and Statements made by Readers and Contributors on this platform do not necessarily represent the views or policy of Multimedia Group Limited.

DISCLAIMER: The Views, Comments, Opinions, Contributions and Statements made by Readers and Contributors on this platform do not necessarily represent the views or policy of Multimedia Group Limited.


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